"adopt a highway" yeah ok but how am I going to take care of a highway. how am I going to put a stretch of asphalt through college
*opens blank tab* yes mom im doing my homework leave me alone dont you trust me at all
*spider shaking dice in casino* come on, daddy longlegs needs a new pair of shoes and a new pair of shoes and a new pair of shoes and a new pair of shoes
laying down on the floor always seems so appealing when u have a lot of homework
HOW DO PEOPLE FALL ASLEEP SO FAST I DON’T UNDERSTAND I HAVE TO CREATE AND ACT OUT A WHOLE FUCKING MOVIE LENGTH STORY IN MY HEAD AND THEN CONTEMPLATE THE MEANING OF LIFE BEFORE I EVEN FEEL TIRED AND THIS BITCH STARTS SNORING IN TWO MINUTES
I am an ER nurse. I am so tired of bringing a patient meds and having the whole family ask “Did the doctor recommend that?” No, the janitor thought some norepinephrine might fix your mom’s BP of 50/10, but she seemed pretty confident so I went with it.